For John, BLUF: Now that gun manufacturers may be sued over guns used in crimes, this could not be far behind. Nothing to see here; just move along.
From The Babylon Bee, 15 November 2019.
Here is the lede plus three:
Acme Forks & Knives was trying to block a lawsuit brought against them by the obese community. The lawsuit suggested that the company's utensils were deadly tools that caused people to become overweight.Seems reasonable to me.
The Supreme Court has blocked the company's attempt to block the lawsuit, paving the way for victims of heart disease and other diet-related ailments to sue Acme.
"Finally---the big forks and knives lobby will be held accountable for contributing to heart disease and obesity, the leading causes of death among American adults," said a spokesperson for the oppressed obese community. "No human action leads to these deaths. It is entirely on the sentient utensils used to carry out the mass eating events."
"Blood is on their hands!" protesters cried. "Fight the corporate fork and knife lobby!"
Hat tip to the InstaPundit.
Regards — Cliff